Saturday, November 3, 2012

The Department Of Beach Surveys

 The Department Of Beach Surveys.

Creative Commons License
The Department Of Beach Surveys by drew Roberts is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License.

The government hires people and sends them to the beach every day. They get a clipboard and a short form to fill out daily. Something like:

Date:
Location:
Survey Taker:

Did you see any sea life today? Y/N
Did you see any birds today? Y/N
Did you see any land animals on the beach today? Y/N
Was it Windy / Calm?
Was it Sunny / Rainy?
Did you encounter any tourists on the beach today? Y/N
   If Yes, did they seem to be having a good time? Y/N
Did you have an enjoyable day at the beach today? Y/N
Optionally note below anything of interest you might want to.

Perhaps if other countries do not have enough beaches, they could send those workers to our country to do the surveys here.

Previous mentions of this concept:

2009
http://www.bahamasissues.com/archive/index.php/t-21481-p-2.html

"What happens to all the untrainable people who got jobs as political favors and are unskilled and basically unhireable anywhere else other than the civil service?

Reassign them to the Department Of Beach Surveys.

Or to the Department Of Redundancy Department Bureau Department Council Board Department."

 2006
http://www.varlinux.org/?p=11290

"
Well, for my country, I keep suggesting the department of beach surveys.
Instead of laying off workers who become redundant or for any other reason, assign them to the department of beach surveys.
They must report to the beach each workday. They are responsible for their own lunches. (This will spur industry as the lunches will be provided by lunch wagons and the like.)
They will be responsible for taking statistics on seagull sightings, fish sightings, tides, seaweed, beach erosion and may other things.
Of course, thay can take swim breaks, rest breaks under the palms, etc.
Everyone is happy. Government does not have to lay off votes. Re-assigned workers get to enjoy the natural beauty of our wonderful beaches on all workdays except for bad weather days, these can be in office or home offices to write up data and reports from fine weather days.
Regular citizens are happy because the regular government departments run better due to not being overstaffed by de-motivated workers.
Win, win, win!"

2009
 http://www.varlinux.org/?p=17061

"
I often suggest down here that we institute the Department of Beach Surveys.
Move those who don’t want to work and the other dead wood into the new agency. Send them to the beach every day with a clipboard and pencil with a for that they have to tick off.
At the beach today did you see:
[] Sand
[] Water
[] Fish
[] Seagull
[] Other marine bird
[] Non-marine bird
[] People other than Government Workers
[] Tourist
[] Boat
[] Jet plane
[] Prop plane
[] Car
[] Truck
etc.
Put up signs: “Your Tax Dollars At Work”
At least the other government offices may not be so gummed up…"

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